“don't be the best at something be the only right and as you're growing up you're always told be the best be the best be the best right and what that kind of does is pushes down or or kind of like buries the weirdness that makes you you”

Don't be the best — be the only

Competing on the same dimension as everyone else means you have to outwork them all to win — and if you do win, the prize is being slightly more excellent at someone else's game. The alternative (Kevin Kelly's rule): find the intersection of your weird specific skills/interests so that the question "who else does it like this?" returns nobody. Aim to be the only person someone thinks of for their exact problem, not the best on a shared leaderboard.