“for me generalist world is not a place that you come and have to hang out all the time it's never there to be a burden on your life it is a trusted non-performative... the value that happens when you do arrive and you do you're either able to contribute or you're able to have your question answered is so great that it doesn't like for me it's not about the the quantity of time that people are spending there it really is about the quality”

Build a non-performative, low-noise community — value per visit, not minutes spent

Standard community metrics chase DAU and engagement — both of which push you toward Discord-style "always-on hangout" pressure that exhausts adult members. Optimize the opposite: zero burden when you're away, high signal when you arrive. Members should be able to disappear for two weeks without guilt and return to find their question answered. The retention metric is "is the next visit worth it?" not minutes per week.